tawakkal-ing.
2:36 AM
To all form 3 students out there right now, some of them must be feeling what i am feeling right now too, right? this insecure feeling that you can't help but feel it. yeah, we did our best and all that, but it is still unavoidable to be feeling like this.sigh. seriously,this feeling is the worst. all thinking "what if.." "and i would be.." "oh man.." "i am dead.." "i don't think i can get.." to be honest, it is tiring to be thinking all of these. but i can't help it. seriously.
everyday, i woke up to think "what will my results be?" "am i getting all Cs??" etc. day by day, it all went by like this. this time, a big sigh. i know i shouldn't be so negative like this. but like i said, i can't help it. of course, i tried to not think about pmr and try to indulge myself into something else. but meh, that didn't work either. deeha! you shouldn't be thinking negatively like this! be positive! trust Allah.
so yesterday, kak Durrah played a video that really hit on me. a video that tells about a hadith, where a beggar came to Aisyah r.a and asked for some food to break his fast when she herself was in a food-less situation either. but nevertheless, Aisyah still gave him what she has, even though it's her only possession. after that, a stranger came knocking and gave her a goat as a gift even when he doesn't know who is Aisyah. isn't that astonishing? so basically, the conclusion here was that for us to just believe in Allah and therefore He will provide. and that, if you want to sadaqah but you're in short of money,just give it. because if you just believe in Him, He will provide. He will. He is the one who will never take back His words.
afterwards, i realized that i shouldn't have felt insecure and all. instead, i should have just put my trust in Allah. because if i believe in His power and love, His existence in this universe and that He's the one who created the universe and also that He's the only one, He will provide. i am not saying He will then definitely give me 9As, but He will give me the best result there is for me. but you guys should know here that the best thing is not only a great thing. a bad thing can also be a good thing, get it? what i meant was, the best result is not always 9As, it could be 3As.
that's why i have to brace myself now and just have in faith with Allah. i worked hard for it anyways, so all i have to do right now is tawakkal-ing.
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